ME.

Hello,

I guess I am going to hate myself at a later time, since I should be doing my computer stastics homework (online homework DO NOT work for me and if you are wondering if that's one reason why i'm here, YA) or sleeping and ensuring that i get enough rest for tomorrow, for the rehearsal at Esplande. I'm running out of time but then I'm still a bloody procrasinator.

anyway, i'm in the 'kind-of-feeling-down' mood and i went to hend and told him i want booz. That is seriously unexpected of me. I read all the blogs on my link list and different blogs tells a different story and with their powers combined, it made me feeling down right now. Hmm, especially with Jia Jia's blog, composed in chinese, used a really depressing tone to describe her encountance with the social norms and expectation we have upon our environment. Then reading Myrin's blog, too much jarcon and abbreviation on her blog for me to digest her text but the skin goes "Will you notice me?" plus hend informing me that Zhen's house warming is tomorrow with me being "shrouded in darkness".. No offence to !19 people because even if I knew about the party, I still won't be able to turn up because of drum. You guys know me well enough to realise that an invitation for saturday events won't work on me so you omited me from the invitation list. I understand. Then i move to reading other blogs and finally coming back to mine. It felt, and still do, that I have disconnected from the world. On top of that, Jia Jia mentioned about taking the uncovential route and breaking free from the environmental expectation imposed on us, futhers clog my brain with questions.

Who is Torna?
What is Lobo's vechicle plate number?
Will i further walk away from the convnetial route?
Will i find my identity and position is society?
i want to know.

Pictures from a bus trip from Lavender to Sembawang.

i like this picture, it feels and looks dark.

like the parallel feeing.

my close-up

Nostalgia Clip, no longer in use but still funtion as an Art of History.

ONg LAi aka YuJun

Story Time.

Hello, posting something i received from Shi Ting long ago.

Here it goes,

"My husband is a scientist by profession, I love him for his steady-being nature, and I love the warm feeling while lean against his broad shoulder.Three years in the courtship and now, two years into marriage, I would have to admit, I am getting tired of it, the reasons of me loving him before has now transform into the cause of all the restlessness. I am a sentimental woman and extremely sensitive and exquisite when it comes to relationship and feelings, I yearn for romantic moments, as though a little boy yearning for candy. And my husband, is just a contrast of me, his lack of sensitivity, and of all, inability of bringing romantic moments into our marriage has disheartened me about love.

One day, I finally decided to tell him my decision, that I want a divorce.
'Why?' he asked, shocking.
'I am tired, there aren't reasons for everything in the world' I answered.

He kept silent the whole night, seems to be in deep thoughts the whole night with cigarette lighted all the times.

My feeling of disappointment is getting intense, a man who can't even express his detainment, what else can I hope from him? And finally he asked:' What can I do to change your mind?' Somebody said it right, it's hard to change a person's personality, and I guess, I have started losing faith in him.

Look deep into his eyes and I slowly answered: 'Here is a question, if you can find the answer in my heart, I will change my mind, Let say, I love a flower at a mountain cliff, and we both sure that the making you to pick the flower will cause death, will you do it for me?' He said:' I will give you your answer tomorrow....'My heart just sinks by listening to his respond.

The next morning, he was not around, and I saw a piece of paper with his scratching writing, underneath a glass of warm milk, It goes....Dear,'I would not pick that flower for you, but please allowed me to further explain the reasons” this first lines has already break my heart. I continue reading. 'You can only type with computer and always messed up the programs in the PC, and cries in front of screen, I have to save my fingers so that I can help to restore the programs. You always left the house key behind, I have to save my legs to rush home for opening the door for you. You love travelling but always lose your way in a new city; I have to save my eyes to leads you the way. You always have the cramp whenever your 'good friend' approach every month, I have to save my palm so that I can calm the cramp at your tummy. You like to stays indoor, and I worries that you will be infected by infantile autism. I have to save my mouth to tell you jokes and stories to cure your boredom. You always stared at the computers, and that do no good to your eyes, I have to save my eyes so that when we grow older, I can help to clip your nails, and help to removed those annoying white hairs. I will hold your hand, stroll down the beach, enjoying the sunshine and the beautiful sands... tell you the colour of flowers, just like the glow on your young face... Thus, my dear, before I am sure there is someone who loves you more than I do... I would not pick the flower, and die... 'My tears drop on the letters, and blurred the ink of his hand writing... and I resume my reading...'

And now, dear... you have finished reading my answer, if you are satisfied with these answers, please open the door of our house, I am standing there, with your favourite bread and fresh milk... I rush to pull open the door, and saw his anxious face, with his hand holding tight on the milk and bread.... Oh I am sure no one ever loves me as much, and now I have decided to leave the flower alone...

That's life, or some said, love, when one is surrounded by love, the feeling of excitement fade away, and one tend to ignore the true love lies in between the peace and dullness. Love shows in any form, even a very little and corny form, it has never been a model, it could be the most incurious form... flowers, romantic moments is only the buckish formed on the surface of the relationship.Under all this, the pillar of truelove stands... and that's our life...I hope everyone enjoyed reading it... love, but not words win the arguments..." *changed colour for Zi Ming.

touching story. even reading it time after time, it still induce the feeling to be more serious in a relation; looking back and finding myself foolish.

pls do comment. thanks.

ONg LAi

Death of a Hero.

Hello!
doing advertising on my blog here..

This is a story about a Hero, a prophecy, and a quest to rid the world of all evil. It is also a story about the 100th Demon. the cause of all chaos, the maker of the Hero.
Will the Hero fall when he meet the 100th Demon, the greatest of them all?



Title: Death of a Her0
Date: 1-3 May 2008, Thursday to Saturday
Time: 8pm to approx. 9.10pm (this is a 70 minutes play but due to the 'live' nature, time may vary slightly
Venue: Esplanade Theatre Studio
Ticket Price: $25 (concession for students, NSF and senior citizens: $20)
Performed in Mandarin, English and some dialects as well.
Advisory:This production contains coarse language.

Why should you go??

-This is a play with humor, meaning, horror, good vs evil and romance.
-Chun Ann (model for the poster), Tony aka Hiu Tung, Ruo Han, myself and some other ex-CCHYians will be performing some minor roles and handling the percussion music, hope you will support.
-May 1st is Labor Day, supposedly, everyone would be free. Otherwise there's Friday and Saturday!!

I will be involved in this play playing some of the percussion music and minor roles in this 70 minute play brought to you by The Puppet Square and percussion music by ZingO. Due to the fact that you are seeing only the front of this flyer, i have listed down the details about the play below. This is keeping my life pretty busy on top of schooling, a lot of hard work and efforts and been put into this play, so i hope you guys and ladies can go support if interested.

Thanks.

ONg LAi

Dreams

Harlow!!

been long since i have not blogged.. peeps who missed my blog entries, i apologise. But the person who might be affected is myself, looking back in life and regretting it when things are forgotten.

Hence,i'm here to record my life down.

For the past weeks it has been kind of hectic for me, both mental and physical; getting more quick-tempered and getting really weak (cough+ flu+ heatiness currently) as a main result of not getting enough sleep. Why you might ask, but if you have read ruo han or zi ming (new)blog or tony or edvwin's blog, you'll know the answer. Life has been filled with Drum practice and Drama rehearsal. So much that my MSN nick has been changed to "Yu Jun is blind to the obvious, On the edge of breaking down and Missing out personal life. However, for his (artist's)sake, will persevere and hope that others won't mind and support 'Death of A Hero' ".. That is basically a summary of my life and emotions. According to Sing Chun, i'm 'seow on' drums now: Wed-teach YYSS drums, Thur-Drama rehearsal, Fri-Drama rehearsal, Sat- Drum practice in the morning, Drama in the evening, Sun-work for family, Mon-teach Drum at YYSS.. hmm, Tuesday is DAY-OFF!! well, my week routine is basically disturbed. but nonetheless, i will push myself to the limit in hope that the return sense of achievement will be good.

then yesterday after the YOG appreciation dinner with some ZingO-ians at Orchard Hotel, with a tummy fulled of average tasting food, it was only a short while before i dozed off to get rest, expecting to get well this morning. During the sleep from 2300hrs to 0830hrs, i recall one dream that i felt really good. That's the strongest motivation for me to post this blog. Perhaps due to the fact that i have not had such a long sleep for ages and i could snooze after my phone rang in the alarm mode that i can recall the dream. The content of the dream is personal, so i won't go into the details, but roughly, it was a departure and then i found the person (read: non-human entity, just came to me in a human form). When the person left with me, i got that feeling that still lingers and resides in me now. I've been thinking about the dream all th day; during breakfast, during wearing contact lens, during taking the bus, while looking the gorgeous girl at the counter, during lectures, during lunch, well, you get my point.

What leaves me pondering is should i look for this person? i've never seen this person before, i cannot remember the look on the face, i cannot remember the feature, only the feeling. Hmm, generally the majority of life would just brush off my question by saying that it's just a dream and just that, nothing else. But irrationally, i feel the urge to ponder over the question further unlike the majority and hopefully get a answer or direction.

Another thing that i wanna record down would be a talk that i had with xiao jun wen, or rather an answer that he dug out off me during dinner. he asked "why are you still in ZingO?" Half stunned and halfway in thinking mode, i gave several reasons(7 actually) why i am still in ZingO. i have the temptation of writing an research paper to support my ideas and reasons. well, if i have had the time, i would. (trust me, i'm not being lazy here. maybe i'll work on it during the holidays) The origin of this temptation actually come from me wanting to answer the long-un-answered-question and to let my other friends who have undefined plans to know what i feel and determine if we have common ground, common reasons for us being in ZingO. Some of the reasons i highlighted are as followes.

1. the Zodiacs are still here in ZingO
2. i would not have a life without being involved in ZingO (read: i devoted my life at ZingO)
3. there is a sense of achievement when accomplishing the tasks and performance on hand.
4. i can learn a lot of things (drama, props making, drums, etc) from being actively involved in ZingO
5. Passion

that's all for today, as well as class ends.

ONg LAi