hi there!

Here blogging to you is a chap that might have gained 3kgs or more due to a very sumptuous buffet dinner yesternight.

Well, yesternight turned out well, it can be seem that no one was not satisfied with the food and the service was good. Majority of our little "class" were there and all the "teachers" turned up to (even we addressed and converted them into our friends) make the day even more interesting. Interesting in sense that how our "class" dress for the occasion, who used the opportunity last evening to wayang to the instructors and who they really are, without the pressure of the "school" setting.

What happened in our room was that we entered the room, to our slight dismay, breathing the smell of the room, eating, chit chatting, eating, laughing as some people gotten "raped" by the rapist of the "class", photos taking and loads more of cam whoring (by guys!!).

Anyway, although yesterday that was a happy occasion, and we were all supposed to enjoy the evening, it didn't work out in that manner for me. Hmm, I asked myself why was I feeling so moody and not getting into the party mood, trying to find come intrapersonal connection.

my list of perhaps came to form something like this:

Perhaps because,

I am Fat (as suggested mainly by Zack and some others) and eating a buffet is not really suitable for fat people?

Perhaps because,

I still have to worry about both the POP performances, one is not up to standards yet, the other is not created yet.

Perhaps because,

I am not a party person, and find comfort in these gathering somewhere near to a wall and just doing things to myself, for myself.

Perhaps because,

I am tired from lack of sleep and been doing things for the whole day starting from 7am til 11pm.

Perhaps because,
Perhaps because,Perhaps because,
Perhaps because,Perhaps because,Perhaps because,
Perhaps because,Perhaps because,Perhaps because,Perhaps because,
Perhaps because,Perhaps because,Perhaps because,Perhaps because,Perhaps because...

i CAN'T ENJOY THE COMPANY LAST NIGHT.

doing things in our little class of 60 people has made me a much dreaded character. Some people identify faults with what I do, others find faults. Some communicate with me about how they feel, others does it behind my back, allowing them to add some spices and elements of truth into it. Some like my ideas, helps and develop my ideas, while others take my ideas and turn it into their own.

All of these did not bothered me until I realised that I have been trying to do my part of the work seriously with much efforts, sometimes having to face the pressures from the top management and the bottom followers, but all of my credits will be shared with my middle management, when they were the most uncooperative crew.

Pressures keep stacking on me to do things around the organisation. But, I firmly believe and entrust myself to not allow these stressing factors and people to meet my threshold and causing myself to burnout. Nope, I will not land on the other side of the stress curve.

YuJun.