ironic approach.

YO PPle!!

this is really ironic, cause you are seeing me posting after my previous post last night saying that "i will be getting busy(lazy)."

kns. *pls note, if you are not 3 years old and above or not ready for a sicky person complaining abt his life problem-cum-frustrations that cannot be changed/improved/altered, pls stop reading.

and today, waking up is another ironic approach by my mom and dad. erm, i went to sleep early to rest, to skip swimming with edvwin, belson and chun ann, and to get better hopefully, but they started rattling at me around 6am. wth. what happened to the "oh, you are sick, rest(sleep) well, and get well soon!" kinda of attitude you use to treat sick pple, especially me who is sick for one bloody week? oh, mom and dad didn't notice(as usual), fine then. *headache now, which is making me very quick tempered* And now i got to tend the shop, which is not really tough, air-conditioned environment, and fake smiling at all the customers(some are really up in your ass.) ouch, my head.

on top of the busy SUNDAY day, my beloved sister is not here currently, carrying out a workshop for the purposes of meeting one of her long-time-no-see volunteer tuition teacher and earn money when the shop(s) are shorthanded. wait a minute! the shop is always shorthanded, that's why most of my holidays revolve around this farm, that the shops are located, that pays for my school fees, my food, my bills and ensure i look like a normal person on the outside. hmm, can't complain abt this, but wondering why my mum and dad are maintain this low labour cost management style, family style. oops, i said it out already. grr.

on a side note, hend have to 'disturb' me now, just scolded him. ***k off!!! (kwx)

then CMPB smsed me to remind me that i haven completely NS registration.. oh my, it's so complex and tedious. more things added to my Headache. woa, now it has evolved to Splitting Headache. not good -.- i still got a few more section to fill up before 9 of Jan, ok, wishing myself good luck here. NS is not bad right? all the fun(and punishment) can get in the short 22 months with lots of presumably straight men (cause when you fill up the pre-enlistment form, under the medical section, they ask if you have any social problems, e.g. homosexuality) and do a lot of activities together, learn new stuff, live life like never before, blow up some earth and kill some target boards, become female-thirsty in the off balanced yin-yang environment and turn vulgar.

oh my, i rattle so much that my Splitting Headache is getting constant, the part of the graph that you see when all the reactants has reacted and reached maximum status. wondering if my nose will start flushing out bloody mucus again. but the good thing is that my cough is gone (pls dun come back for the next 6 months), my nose is cleared with little amount of fluids flowing out still, i want NEED sleep!

oh my, this time, it would be good for my sister to arrive at the shop and says she will take over my duties from now so i can go rest. -.- my big fat hope. and now there's a uncle in the shop, sitting within 1meter radius of me and speaking loudly over the phone and seriously, messing with my metal processes and making my blood throb harder.

*complains and complains*

and since i think i will be busy(really busy, not lazy) tmr, let's say something for next year.

year 2008!

self: starve your self at school, especially MegaBites food, cause the food does not worth the money, buy a bottle of 1.5L water from Ngee Ann's Cheers and survive on that. exercise more, get lean to attract more girls. enjoy better company. grow taller still. feed myself less.

other self: try to lower standards, try even harder to forget about the past, erase the moral values settled in since young, turn into a jerk/playboy and fall into love recklessly. basically, turn into a flirt, if i got the minimum requirements to do that.. haha, take this paragraph with a pinch of salt.

Studies: while starving self, study for a better grades. the quality of the grades now is sure gonna waste the school fees i am paying right now. make more smart friends, practice more if i have to, live no life, live school life while in school. study from 0700hrs to 1900hrs. pinch of sugar this time. but the truth is A-,B+,B,B,B- is really not good enough.

ZingO: dot dot dot. thinking thru Edvwin's words right. if true, then should all slow learners just pick up a piece of rock and hit themselves in the head until they are dead? even as someone not very religious,i would say that the supreme forces have created pple equally in my point of view, strengths and limitations are equally spread out, the only thing different is time, that's why we do not have the ability of manipulate time. all i wanna say is hang on there, whatever comes, take in in our strive and with a little self conscious, we will pull thru and become the best of best friends til we die. just have to pull things together. why, cause we are part of 不一样的 Boy Band. lol.
and i want more quality pple to join, not pple who just come and quit halfway, pple who can pull thru challenges with us. and want better works. simple wish, but enormous efforts needed to achieve.

for Singapore: pls increase the POSE bank interest rates of about 0.5% to match the very high inflation of abt 3.7% or 3.9% to ensure that your pple get adequate real money to live life properly and not by doing all other not as effective approaches like giving GST offset package to artificially stimulate the economy.it does not work, pple just spend the lump sum away on luxurious items and then cry and swear at the inflation. ok maybe it works to artificially stimulate the economy but it does not help with the inflation much.

for Asia: become a more powerful region than the UK. haha, first get rid of corruption.

for the US: sign the Kyoto Protocol!

for the world: greater efforts to save Earth and those huge magically powerful trees.

ok, me with 3 hours of blogging is getting restless in my sick state.

thanks for reading and thanks for the concern.

ONg LAi
limewire for Santa Vic today.

busy

yo pple,

keeping this real short before i go knock myself out to get soem more sleep.

the new year is coming soon, which means i will be getting more busy(lazy). so dun be surprised if i dun blog as much.. haha.

thank you.

YuJun.

merry X'mas

MERRY CHRISTMAS EVERYONE!

for the past week and especially the recent days, my life revolved around one word, tired.

been trying to run daily, go see performance, BBQ overnight, man, it has taken a toll on me. highest temperature today was 37.6 degree Celsius plus sneezed and coughed out bloody mucus. lethargic feelings all over. physically worn out.

however, all of the busy schedule was worth it. well, apparently the company compensated for the low physical-stability levels. lots of things happened, then lazy to go into the details right now, due to the block nose and sore throat. hmm, personally, just have to remember that i felt like it was the good old CCHY/CCHB days again. thanks to xjw.

rest is essential to repair my body.

ho ho ho ho..

ONg LAi

gg to change blogskin soon. after x'mas.

merry X'mas

MERRY CHRISTMAS EVERYONE!

Mixed up feelnigs

yo pple,

keeping it short by point form.

• got my first NS letter, asking me to register with online.
• then after much trial and error, finally got it right.
• babies have an wonderful power, to make you forget the distressing impacts of the letter.
• then the living prove cum 17year old friends are not helping much with the hopes in getting a deferment.
• tried to get deferment, but then dunno how to carry on when ask "level of education?", there are no options that goes "Private degree".
• going to bombard Ann Sum, my much beloved (especially at this time) course administrator tmr morning,or afternoon.
• ok, off to watch anime.
• Hend, i hope you are right.
• And last but not least, Santa, i want 7 semesters deferment for this X'mas, if it's too hard, i am willing to get the deferment in instalments of 3 semester for annually. lol

YuJun/ONg LAi

the mixed (and pent) up feelings of embracing NS. "santa, i want deferment, pls"

not right.

yo pple, it's late already, so gonna keep it short.

today is an depressing day.. it started out well with a very enjoyable session of PT, but then the afternoon, after my evaluation in the evening, wasn't as great as i expected it would be.

after viewing "how to get a full body cramp" demonstration by wei ling, and saw the i-just-woke-up-and-live-life-without-me-first side of shi xiong, went to AMK hub for planned, much expected K-box session.

it seems that expectation is the cornerstone to great disappointment, then the cliche phrase comes to mind, the harder you climb, the harder you fall.

K-box is not as enjoyable as the previous session. haiz, not on form today, wo ke yi and wo huai nian de, is disastrous. omFg. what went wrong?

the company, because tony wasn't there? possible, since Janice feels that her singing is lousier than usual. or is it with the training in the morning?

enough of looking at external attributes, what abt internal attributes? my voice, getting worse? i feel that my vocal range is getting narrower, on top of that, it is harder to sing the more emotional songs.. hmm, hav i lost my touch?

in summary, money wasted by bad singing plus shame upon self.

then watch the movie, 'warlords' or something like that (sorry for the causal-ness, focused on the movie but not the title.)

it's a good show, worthy of it's 4.5 out of 5 rating. if you dun mind or even like abit gore, it's a great film. but felt so tired watching the show, very mentally stressful. and physically exhausted by the training in the morning.

*yawns*

tired already, sleep time.

yu jun.

on a side not, some new things i learnt from some pple.

ruo han has a new camera

tracy is close to que

wei ling is akin to a sea monkey in training but a shy cheeky monkey in the midst of
fun.

Recidivism

Ong Yu Jun
BScBA

UB/SIM
BAC, BAP & BScBA
ESL408 Fall 07’ Class D
Instructor: Mrs. Shirley James
Essay #3: Final Draft

Recidivism

The child who always cries for his toy is a recidivist, criminals who are regulars at the jail are recidivists and the people who vote the same people back into the constituency every five years are recidivists as well! A recidivist can be anyone who has a behavior pattern, but it is more common to spot them only when the behavior in not widely accepted in the society. Recidivism is the repetition of past behavior, more often utilized in the context of criminal acts by law enforcers rather than in the general context concerning habitual patterns that has little recognition especially when the self is involved in recidivism.


Recidivism is the tendency to lapse into previous patterns of behavior. Recidivism occurs almost everywhere in the world; the smoker who has quit smoking but picks up the cigarette once again to ‘de-stress’, the child who wet his bed weeks again after being successfully toilet-trained, the plump lady who cannot keep to her slimming diet and even the alcoholic who just drank 6 pints after he avoided alcohol for the whole of yesterday. Recidivism is like gravity, a force opposing against our upward motion towards our aim of changing undesired behavior. Changing habits, resembles jumping, it requires efforts to occur; but more, if not most, often we revert back to the old habits and are pulled back to our old ways, back into our comfort zones like fishes in water.

Going against recidivism require great effort. It is like going against the current of waves, whereas going along with recidivism is akin to having the winds in the sails- that is the reason countless people are recidivists. When all others are being recidivist in a way or the other, we find it a social norm to be a recidivist with our little habits that do not pose danger or any significant effect to the people around. However, recidivism has a flipside. Recidivism can refer to the repetition of negative behaviors that are socially unacceptable or morally questionable despite training or punishment to discourage the behavior. One example of such negative recidivism can be identified with the criminals and in a sense; they are analogous to polluted water, being contaminated with their crime ways and pose great risk to the others whom they have contact with.

The use of the word ‘recidivism’, especially in the United States, sometimes refers to the criminals who seem to be unable to break away from the life of crime and prison. A measure used by law enforcers called recidivism rates, measures and shows how the number of criminals who repeatedly commit crimes after being released from jail and being imprisoned thereafter. In this manner, the government can observe and evaluate the penal system to improve on the recidivism rates. If the recidivism rate is high, it can mean that the punishment is too light for the crimes and therefore, relevant changes should be made to reduce the recidivism rate. However, the measure does not reveal the willingness of the criminal recidivist to recidivate. Shelving aside those criminals who get a kick from committing crimes and those who prefer to live in the jail as free lodging, criminals generally find it hard to not recidivate. There are several reasons for that. One reason is that the criminals do not posses any skills apart from committing crimes for a living seen more commonly in juvenile cases. Another reason would be that they have are not able to fit back into the society because of their criminal background and sometimes they commit crime for money, for attention or to go back to their comfort zone. These criminals will need education on the life after jail, educating them not to recidivate and landing themselves back in jail. The forces pulling them to revert back into criminal life are too overwhelming for the average criminal to fight single-handedly; what these criminal recidivists need is education, support and reminders for them to break away from the life of a criminal.
There is another branch of society that recidivism has deep impact upon the people in it; the family. Within a family, there are generally two parties; the educators and the learners. The latter, normally the children, are more prone to show acts of recidivism in the family due to their learning stages and to err is the first step to learn under the attention of the parents. On the other hand, parents, who administer punishment or training to their children, are also recidivist at times. Well, it is much debated that physical punishment is not a good way to punish children as the consequences are that the children may grow up to be more aggressive and violent. In the Asian context, parents are encouraged not to spank their children but administer punishment in the non-violent way. Some parents try to use the non-violent method but when the children goes on a tantrum, fight among themselves or just refuse to understand the beckon of the parents, the cane is drawn out and recidivism occurs. Being brought up in the ‘violent’ parenting style, parents are deeply rooted in this style and like plants, shifting by self will is not possible. Unless an external party slowly conditions the parents, uprooting them with much patience and hard work, like digging the soil around the roots of the plant, to ensure that the change of environment does not kill the plant but allow it to be able to grow better then the current situation.

Recidivism is a widely seen behavior and going against it require immerse efforts as it means stepping out of one’s comfort zone of past behavior into a new unfamiliar environment with new practices and slipping back to the previous environment is effortless. People hardly acknowledge themselves as recidivists and hence do not make the extra efforts to break away from the negative and unwanted behavior. People revolve around recidivism and identifying the forces of recidivism helps in improving, modeling a better person.

***

A-minus standards.

just for HAHs

Yo PPle.

spent a lazy afternoon preparing for saturday..

haha. leave that for saturday..

and miss Ong KAiix xin, dun be so vulgar and i admit the following is funny.. so is yours. HAH

Ten Top Trivia Tips about ONg LAI!

1. Czar Paul I banished ONg LAI to Siberia for marching out of step.
2. Ostriches stick their heads in ONg LAI not to hide but to look for water.
3. A bride should wear something old, something new, something borrowed, and ONg LAI.
4. Bananas don't grow on trees - they grow on ONg LAI!
5. ONg LAI has four noses.
6. It is bad luck to light three cigarettes with the same ONg LAI!
7. More people are killed by ONg LAI each year than die in aeroplane accidents.
8. The air around ONg LAI is superheated to about five times the temperature of the sun.
9. ONg LAI has a memory span of three seconds.
10. It took ONg LAI 22 years to build the Taj Mahal.

http://thesurrealist.co.uk/trivia.pl
" method="get" style="background-color:#5F5F42;color:#CFCF95;padding:4px;text-align:center">I am interested in - do tell me aboutherhimitthem

ok, you have your HAHs.

go back to what you were doing.

lol

ONg LAi

it, is the star.

he, comes into the light.

moving his fingers to flex and quickly force the palms together as if he was clapping for it. but the sound did not come out just right. it was muffered because his palms were still together. They looked at him, and look at it, and in slience,wondering who will make the next move.
for the next few moments, he went thru the steps in his mind, from start to the end, planning was important for him. he breathe in, and then breathe out almost just as sliently as the muffered clap.

they looked at him more with more focus, wondering if he was going to give up and it was going to move. then, he made the first move. the first interaction with it.

he slowly spread his palms apart, slowly, slowly. once he was sastified with the distance between the two arms, he swung them forward, as if a fisherman casting his net. after he made some circles with his hand, he stopped, and pull back his arms. it moved.

it stood up, on it's legs and turned to face them. then it fell face down. he was shocked by it and let his arms go loose, swinging from his shoulders as thou he has lose control over his arms and it was only hanging from his shoulders. but it was not as how they seen it. he just wanted a rest, it has strain his arms.

it lay on the stage.

he raised his arms and move his fingers as if playing the piano. they were waiting to hear the music from the speakers, but no sound were heard from the speakers but from the drums, hidden in the darkness of the stage. he moved a step back and try moving his fingers. the stage is slowly lit up and the sound from the drums has slowly evolved into a pulsing rhythm that caught their attention over it.

he walked towards it, picked it up and went to the backstage.

Valentine roses

Yo PPle!

new blogskin to switch to a more relaxing mood.

the weather been really bad. On top of that, family business pressure is being activated with the official notice of my 5 week holidays isn't helping. shall not talk about these too much. just gonna say that it is plain depressing.

then received an email from Shi Ting, my college friend. although not considered close, it doesn't matter since i am generally not close with my uni friends anyway, she emailed me a very smooth essay, and i think we can share it in the festive season and in preparation for the love season in Feb.

Valentine roses

Red roses were her favorites, her name was also Rose. 
And every year her husband sent them, tied with pretty bows. 
The year he died, the roses were delivered to her door. 
The card said, "Be my Valentine," like all the years before.

Each year he sent her roses, and the note would always say, 
"I love you even more this year, than last year on this day." 
"My love for you will always grow, with every passing year." 
She knew this was the last time that the roses would appear.

She thought, he ordered roses in advance before this day. 
Her loving husband did not know, that he would pass away. 
He always liked to do things early, way before the time. 
Then, if he got too busy, everything would work out fine.

She trimmed the stems, and placed them in a very special vase. 
Then, sat the vase beside the portrait of his smiling face. 
She would sit for hours, in her husband's favorite chair. 
While staring at his picture, and the roses sitting there.

A year went by, and it was hard to live without her mate. 
With loneliness and solitude, that had become her fate. 
Then, the very hour, as on Valentines before, 
The doorbell rang, and there were roses, sitting by her door.

She brought the roses in, and then just looked at them in shock. 
Then, went to get the telephone, to call the florist shop. 
The owner answered, and she asked him, if he would explain, 
Why would someone do this to her, causing her such pain?

"I know your husband passed away, more than a year ago," 
The owner said, "I knew you'd call, and you would want to know." 
"The flowers you received today, were paid for in advance." 
"Your husband always planned ahead, he left nothing to chance.""There is a standing order, that I have on file down here, 
And he has paid, well in advance, you'll get them every year. 
There also is another thing, that I think you should know, 
He wrote a special little card...he did this years ago."

"Then, should ever, I find out that he's no longer here, 
That's the card...that should be sent, to you the following year." 
She thanked him and hung up the phone, her tears now flowing hard. 
Her fingers shaking, as she slowly reached to get the card.Inside the card, she saw that he had written her a note. 
Then, as she stared in total silence, this is what he wrote... 
"Hello my love, I know it's been a year since I've been gone, 
I hope it hasn't been too hard for you to overcome."

"I know it must be lonely, and the pain is very real. 
For if it was the other way, I know how I would feel. 
The love we shared made everything so beautiful in life. 
I loved you more than words can say, you were the perfect wife."
"You were my friend and lover, you fulfilled my every need. 
I know it's only been a year, but please try not to grieve. 
I want you to be happy, even when you shed your tears. 
That is why the roses will be sent to you for years."
"When you get these roses, think of all the happiness, 
That we had together, and how both of us were blessed. 
I have always loved you and I know I always will. 
But, my love, you must go on, you have some living still."
"Please...try to find happiness, while living out your days. 
I know it is not easy, but I hope you find some ways. 
The roses will come every year, and they will only stop, 
When your door's not answered, when the florist stops to knock."
"He will come five times that day, in case you have gone out. 
But after his last visit, he will know without a doubt, 
To take the roses to the place, where I've instructed him, 
And place the roses where we are, together once again." - anonymous

touching heh? for me, it was more of the smooth and fluent writing that attracted much of my attention rather that the storyline although credit have to go to the storyline for the impact of the essay.

ok, it's late. got to sleep.

Night!

YuJun
"fa~la~la~la~la~la la~la~la~la"

on a side note, pple are trying to get many things for X'mas by playing santa.

"ONg LAi says:
i want cash for x'mas, santa vic!

santa vic says:
u gotta sit on my lap

santa vic says:
and go down on me"

hope victor is not gh3y. lol

chop this off elvina ah yi's blog.

What's Your Best Quality? Your Result: Personality Your best quality is your personality! People like you because you are an all around good person. You have good manners and values. You also like to express your personal style and interests.
Ambitious
Sense of Humor
Intelligence
Out-Going
Loving
What's" Your Best Quality? Take More Quizzes

erm.. either the quiz is inaccurate and ironically for me, or my other traits are worse than my personality.

Yu Jun

yea, course registrations!

yo pple!





look at this!!

i know, i know, you are lost, but then, for me, it is good news!! these are the classes that i chose and successfully got enrolled in.



after a 40 minute struggle with the SIM network and with my computer's 'f5' key being clicked on every 3 seconds, this is the final results: NO CLASSES ON TUESDAY AND FRIDAY!
thank you 'F5' !



however, 5 minutes of elation is followed by this,,, *sobs*

you may not see it carefully, this is the text which is written in the photo.

"Class Selection Update - Nov 6, 2007
Dear all,We continue to experience problems with our server and will have to stop all selection activities immediately. We will resume this exercise tomorrow (Dec 7) at 5pm. Sincere apologies for the delay.

Neo Beng Tong Principal Academic Advisor "

oh my.. what a waste of time and efforts.

awaiting for another round of struggle tmrw.



YuJun.
ps. this post was written with the first half not knowing the stupid cork up.

wo ke yi

Yo pple!

i'm still sick if you are concerned.. lol

my grandma was feeling giddy after dinner this evening, which made me worried abt her and realised the fragile-ness of life.. and i got the same feeling that her days are numbered again for the past few weeks. hopefully i am wrong.

then been obsessed with this song lately, not that it is new but then the tune get played in my head more often then ever recently. so went to youtube to get this MTV.

ENJOY!!



YuJun.
weak body accompanied by weak spirit.

Exams

Yo PPle.

the Finals exams are finally here and i am recidivist again.. to help you understand that word, i will be posting my definition essay based on that word some other days..cause the soft copy is in my thumbdrive, not in the computer, and it is with hiu tung, awaiting to be filled with songs.. oh my, how i miss ESL408 already.

anyway, trying to absorb all the advices from those who commented on my previous post.. it's hard to piece everything like a perfect puzzle, so i let time do the bigger part of the job. on a side note, i am deem as petty and an obnoxiously conceited person. nvm that.

some personality trails to be changed.

1) Do not treat the pretty little boys as friends, else they think of me as gay or even pedophile.

2) talk less, the less i talk, the less trouble i will get into right? and the involvement with otheres reduces and hence expectations will greatly reduce.

3) Psychoanalysis myself. plus self-conginitive therapy.

:

:

n) [to be thought some other time].

and birthday celebrations at KFC is like one of a kind but the positive effects of the company around overspill the not-so-good environment.

here's one pic from the birthday celebration of Julie, Zhen and Sarah, taken with kaii.

what big hands we have! all for the buddy meal!

hey, dun let your thoughts run wild, we are "buddies".. for $10.95.

lol

and today, i did a very weird thing. on my way from KAP to SIM, i saw some ignited sawdust, with the ignition starting from a burning cigarette butt. then i just kicked the burnt areas, thinking that it will cause the combustion to cease. then when i walked past the same place on my way to take the bus home, i saw more areas burning.. oops, i was spreading the combustion. what a mistake. then the normal me would just walked away and went to take the bus home, however, i went to Cold Storage to buy 3 litres of water and went back to that area to put out the combustion. didn't even know why i did that. but curse the guy or gal who threw the cigarette butt on the sawdust. i reckon some of the plants there might be unable to survive since they were being overheated.

anyway, it's the exams time and i am sick, feeling damn heaty in the throat and nose. hope i can survive the exams in the state and hope that the unwellness won't evolve into a more powerful state.

haiz, off to get some off-the-counter-medicine.

nights pple!

ONg LAi/YuJun
ps. i think i am gg to flunk my PSY101.

Detested Personality.

Yo PPLE!

ZingO Recruitment Drive 2007 has finally come to an end, and there is not more reason for me to run away from revising for the Final Exams. So, Revise Hard, ONg.

only lately, perhaps this evening, i discovered that me, myself, is not up to a certain standard. you ask me, how do i define this standards? i would say read on and try to use your own standard as a bench mark.

apart from the family factor, which scope can be so extensive that i won't be able to go thru every one's family background, there are the all different aspects of life.

let's start with the main reason why i am not happy with myself. can i ask you a every close-ended question, " if you are sitting at a table of pple and i am in your 'conversationable' range, in other words, will you talk to me voluntarily?"

Well, maybe there will be the "hello! Whats up?!" greeting, but what happens next, blanks stares and followed by changing another subject(person) talk to. Well, you get my point right?? I DON'T HAVE THE X-FACTOR for people to continue holding a conversation with me.

this is how it went, on the 24th evening , there was a movie with the usual gang plus the seniors, Da Vin, Ed and Kel. then when we met up and went from watching a movie to pool session, i felt left out in all the talks and fun that Night creates. it begun with the seniors asking where all of us(or rather the others) are studying, CA at UB/SIM, Teck Wee after O levels, Ruo Han in TP, in the seniors' Salvo (felt a prick in the neck when hearing that comment) and finally, belson in Sim Mei ITE.

just to reassure, i am not jealous with Belson and the others !! ok maybe a little.. but for me, the problem lies with myself i think.

the night went by, while walking, while playing pool, i was treated as if i was an stranger while the others were closer to the seniors than me. for example, playing pool with Edmund, we didn't even talk thru the game while tw and ca had a lot to converse about.

on the way back, i was thinking why this happened. then flashbacks came along to rub salt into my 4 inch deep wound. from the past til now, there is always a pattern, of how i interacted with people; having much to talk abt for a brief period and losing close contact forever from then. ponders and ponders, then this easily saturated point situation does not applies to interaction with people only, but also in all the other aspects of my life.

picking up of skill, learn the basics moderately fast enough but then when to learn further and more, it is as if my capacity to learn is at the saturation point.

then leading me to think that, even the usage of myself from others point of view is the same. at first, i am pretty much easy to use for the everyday task, then at the next stage, people slowly find me unable to cope their demands anymore and then push me aside.

so, is there a problem with my intrapersonal?? is there something wrong with my personality that i had not observed?

or had i created a self-fulfilling prophecy situation? have i behaved in such a way to deserve this treatment from others? some people used to sit around me during lectures, i would talk to them before or after the class, but absolutely not during the lecture. then after a few lectures, they will drift away, finding other classmates to chatter during the lecture. then me, being attentive in class, abstaining from talking to them. does this act makes me boring and having an unattractive personality? knowing that this kind of things will happen, i ignore them and try to be myself. there after, i think that they are chatter boxes and if they want to behave this way, it's not my fault, so let them be. but now, looking back, have i behaved in the way that increased the possibility of them associating me with an detested personality?

these questions won't get out of my mind and because one question leads to another, my mind is filled with questions that i constantly ask myself but dun get any answers. it taxes my mind and somehow, drinking Merlot from the bottle makes me fall asleep and push these questions into the sleepyard.

can i get answers from within? knowing that my defense mechanism, esp rationalisation and sublimation, will be able to counter all answers i get externally..

Kinda depressed and repressed.

is it because of this that it hurts to hear Ruo Han say 'ty' always?

but on a side note, all the participants for the ZingO recruitment drive are successfully accepted, that means more chances to play with weiling(muhahahahaha) but the are still work that i have to do, to make this Recruitment more fruitful.

YuJun / ONg LAi

BBQs are just too troublesome, especially without a car. what incentives are there for me to organise the BBQ this year? omg, one more question in my mind, whiskey pls!!

*pukes*

Yo PPle!!

study week has begun.. so slacking at home..

wait a minute, i am not slacking.. have been sorting out the papers for ZingO and editing them.. now, looking at those papers, i feel like puking.. so worn out..

gg to make a few calls to some people and then make some very important calls. well..

time is running out!!

haha

hope tmrw's recruitment will be fruitful, won't be cheap ,and successful.

*pukes*,
YuJun

Holidays!! but work first...

Hello PPle!!

ZingO registration is closed!! thank you all for registering.

meaning that the preparation work is halfway done.. now, focusing on the internal preparation work that is condensed from 2weeks to 5 days.. yea. what great news..

"these few weeks is very busy, got alot of projects and assignment. you can't blame anyone for this"

then better not blame me for the recruitment being a success or failure..remembering that i have my fair share of projects and assignments to do.. it seems that my words lack respect, rather than power(due to the strong opposition to the fallacy which i conjured unknowingly)..

After the Recruitment, it will be the ZingO End-Of-Year Chalet with the current ZingO-ians and the freshies from the ZingO recruitment le!! Yea!!!

hope things can fall into places as i plan and not compressed nor condensed..

and i am experiencing K-box Absence Syndromes (eg, humming/singing a tune not knowingly, downloading the hottest K songs, learning new songs to sing in K-box).. I want go K-box!!!!

but all that will have to wait until 3 weeks later..

Fall Semester is gg to end in 3 weeks time, with the final exams coming to crush me with the recidivist dwelling under the skin.. After that, HOLIDAYS! shouldn't be too happy with the holiday with respect to the results thou..

i dun like online assignments, especially questions involving Business calculus!! flunk the recent test again.. so out of the 20% my final MTH131 grade, i am gg to get 12.5% out of the 20%.. bye bye to A grade and A- grade.

then i have a habit to avoid doing the research paper.. so til now, all the references and citation is wrong, and my second draft is not out yet with the dateline on Tuesday.. haiz. sometime in my life, i will control this recidivism..

ok, off to work.

YuJun/ONg LAi
recidivism, Recruitment, Holidays, Chalet, performances.

LAST 5 days

ATTENTION TO PEOPLE INTERESTED IN JOINING ZINGO

• 5 more days before the recruitment registration closes, act fast if you have not!!
• do take note of the previous post of you are interested to register but dunno how
• for those who are interested, BUT unable to make it on that day due to some very very very very very valid reason for not being able to turn up on that day, pls contact me, let me know, let ZingO judge if your reason is valid and if we are able to have a make up session for you. :]

on a side note, ZingO is getting more excited by the recruitment already!! however, if the responses can be greater, we will get more excited!! with rational thinking, do consider joining us and be part of our team.

Yu Jun

onglai1990@hotmail.com

yujunong@gmail.com

ZingO Recruitment Drive 2007

ATTENTION TO INTERESTED ZINGO-MEMBERS-TO-BE!!!

Well, as you may or may not know, ZingO recruitment drive is on!!!

It will be on the 24th of Nov (Saturday) and will be held at Chung Cheng High School (Yishun). I will let you know of the other details in the reply email.

Some minimum requirements:

(I can't possibly list it all down)

-*at least 14 years of age or secondary 2 of education; which ever is higher*

-interest in ZingO and willing to commit in ZingO
-physically able
-positive attitude and personality
-looks pleasant to the eyes(we are performers after all)

I will need to submit a list of the participants to the principal of CCHY by the 17th of Nov. Interested parties, *pls contact me through email as a form of registration before the 17th with the subject as 'ZingO recruitment 2007' follow by your full name.*

Send it to either of the following emailing addresses will do:

onglai1990@hotmail.com
yujunong@gmail.com

Pls include the following information in the email you will be sending to me:
-Name
-age
-gender
-NRIC number
-School (current/latest)
[Note: please send the email on your own behalf. ]

Hope to see you there!!

Yu Jun
ZingO (Welfare)
(*changes made, do take note)

mind over matter?

Yo PPle.

as you may have noticed, my previous was kind of a lengthy piece which earned some some response from djw and Pui Yee.

addressing pui yee first: thank for the compliment!! will work harder to improve more, yea, i do not have to bear you commemting on my lousy English anymore. and meet up soon for coffee, rmb the big glass jar and 2 cups of coffee.

next, djw.

"djw: ong u seem realli lost .. lol .. every1 will have their own stress .. remember tat .. not onli u .. but everything is in ur mind .. u wan to overcome stress den 1st overcome ur mind .. =)" -- djw

the reasons he is able to understand what i mean were 1) he is having a 1 month holiday from NS due to his ribcage. 2) he came and watched the performance on the 2nd of Nov and 3) he knows about the ZingO recruitment.

adapting the idea from Mark Twain, "it is a mind and matter issue, if you do not mind, it does not matter". in this quote, it refers to the things that affects you. djw was used this idea and referring to the stress that i noted in my previous post.

since i read the tag, i had 2 questions in my mind.

1) if i do not mind, will i still be in ZingO and will i feel satisfied?

ok, really hits and i cannot totally ignore the happenings in my life. so the second question came to mind.

2) at which angle should i try to slant my point of view to achieve the "don't mind yet doesn't matter goal?"

really, thinking over this question makes me rack my brain; i can sit in lectures and block out the lecturer's words and think over this question, i can sit in the bus and miss a stop (just happened this morning) all because of this question. then i still have not been able to answer the question. however, i do know that i want ZingO to grow and i am going to do my best and not let others get in my way. it not stress that makes me feel so discourage but other factors( i think i can handle stress quite well you see)..

aiyaa ,look at the time.

can't blog anymore, will continue next time..

off to do prepare for ZingO recruitment.

bb

Yu Jun

helpless

won't it be great if we can choose when we want ot live in? as in travelling thu time to go back or forth to live your life again or like never before?

if i can do that, i will go back to secondary 2 and repeat that time period again and again. despite the fact that i was an much hatred figure in sec school back then, i still managed to find much fun practicing drums.

life was pretty much simple then. there's no ZingO to worry about, dun have to put in alot of efforts to try to make a change in ZingO but still achieve no results, no essays to write, no ass kissing, no calculus,etc, etc.

life now is stressful. according to the physician Hans Selye, stressed is the nonspecific response of the body to any demand made upon it. (yes, i am being technical, but this is my blog isn't it?)

then i asked my self, am i really stressed with demands?

of course i am!
Demanded by the school to give efforts to do work and study for the exams.
Demanded by the instructors to finish tonnes of work that seem to be due all together.
Demanded by ZingO to trigger improvements, which just seem to be ever so hard to do so.
Demanded by ZingO people to be able to handle internal relations well.
Demanded by my family to be the good boy at home, to do the chores, accompany my grandma, to help out at the shop in the weekends and holidays, to come home early and to be successful.
Demanded by dynamics between logic and desire and constantly telling myself that my life is too preoccupied to be taking care and thinking of another person for ages.
Demanded by the list of demands that just seem to be never ending.

i understand that relations are just like clouds; they form upon fate, and they will have to disperse or cause rain one day or another but why does it seem so hard to keep ourselves light without the burden of unnecessary involvements?

why must we humans always think that we are capable to the extend that we lose control like creating a dam that one day will drown us off?

from Jake, the walking reminder that i have to face NS in my course of studies, "when we get closer to light, the stronger we get to the shadows."

dunno why, Tanya Chua's songs seem to hit me in the heart deeply.

and the theme music for the movie ' lust' broadcasting from YES933 right now.

time flies and amidst time, how do we actually make this time worth living for? worth to remember? through arguments or stagnantation or even recidivism?

then i ask, so you want to improve or recidivate? tell me truthfully or else keep your mouth to yourself.

one observation i made is that people who are the only child in the family, tend to be more selfish and throw tantrums as there were brought up, "king of the family". no wonder we switch to governments rather than kingships.

knowing these little things about people really helps,as in you can predict the responses from people and understanding the rational behind that behaviour which sometimes can rack the brains out, especially to self.

told belson earlier that i just felt lost after reading a mail reply to a lot of people, actually, i felt helpless. to share with you, i fear of being helpless to things happening arond me, helpless as time tick seconds by seconds away and our life and essence in living might be wasted.

i want ZingO members to be with ZingO. i dun want to lose another comrade to others. pls make sure you come back, if you are lost, find your way back.

ONg LAi

helpless to the change in hearts.

Shi xiong's birthday.

YO pple,

taking a breather here while printing my notes of the lectures and papers for the projects..

HAPPY BIRTHDAY TO JAMIE SUSIE THOMAS AND ZINGO FOUNDER, ROCH ONG CHEE HAU!!

what great birthdays they have, HAPPY HALOWEEN! as well..

then just now went to causeway point with shi xiong.there was 7pple (for the dunno how many times) present including the old birthday man.. pssss, teck wee, you are not supposed to know who was there..

it was meant to be our treat and instead, shi xiong paid for the meal again. it totally dampened the birthday spirit. we specially met up to treat him an d this is wat happened?! !@#$%!@#$%^&*

from a birthday celebration, it turned out to be akin to the normal treats he would give us when we spend dinnertime with him.. unless he feels damn blissed/happy/good treating us to dinner, we felt failure in this birthday celebrations. why did things have to turn out this way??

then went home straight after dinner due to the dampened atmosphere.

so depressing to fail in organising an event..

YuJun

ZINGO-IANS! PLS GO READ MY REPLY TO THE ANNOUCEMENT CREATED BY CHUN ANN REGARDING THE ZINGO RECUITEMENT DRIVE! READ CAREFULLY AND THINK DEEP. THANKS.

sometimes love makes you hurt like nothing else in the entire world. This usually comes in the form of loss or rejection. More often than not, loss is a part of loving. Losing the love of someone you care deeply for is sometimes like a glass splinter working its way to your heart. It’s a slow, deep sort of alternating pain and numbness which no one else not in your position, just does not seem to understand. As Neil Gaiman so succinctly wrote in his comic book novel series, "It hurts. Not just in the imagination. Not just in the mind. It's a soul hurt, a body hurt, a real gets inside you and rips you apart pain." -- Leong Wan

quick post before i get back to work.. it's past one already.. perhaps i am not gg to sleep at all.

YuJun

status: slacking between the 4.5 hour break

YO pple!

blogging on SX laptop now..

well, it is the midst of the 4.5 hour break.. and kim ROBBED me of my PSP to play.. hence, i am here to kill time..

this two weeks will be project week.. loads of prjects on hand now.. psychological project, macroeconomics article evalution, world history essay, calculus online test 3 and essay 3, definition.. so kinda busy.. shouldn't be slacking now but i am.. haha

so won't be posting much unless such a convenient chance knocks on my brain-step again.

okok.. gg to do my econs le..

but before that, let me remind myself that GREEN TEA FRAPPE IS NOT THE FUEL TO POWER MY BRAIN TO WORK!

YuJun

recessions of my blog & birthday's celebrations.

Yo PPLe!

as you may have noticed, my blog isn 't doing very well for the past week. However, before last week, it was a boom! almost posting daily and this week is kinda of dead.. well, it's normal, i would say it is the ' business cycle'.. thou the period is very short.. lol

anyway, the past week passed by quite fast. the clocks in the school seem to be ticking time away faster in my point of view. too much projects and assignments.. i know this sounds lame ,

but I WILL SURVIVE!

okok, thay was some reassurance for myself.

and sort of motivation.

and talking with jie min while composing this post, this was what we said.

"chunruktur says:
how have u been doing?

mature thinking affects my looks. "dude, i thought you were 23!" -.- says:
erm ok ok lor

mature thinking affects my looks. "dude, i thought you were 23!" -.- says:
got a damn lot of work on hand now.

chunruktur says:
hahas

chunruktur says:
is like tt de luhs

chunruktur says:
lols

mature thinking affects my looks. "dude, i thought you were 23!" -.- says:
then very lazy, tired and not motivated plus no inspiration to study.

mature thinking affects my looks. "dude, i thought you were 23!" -.- says:
lol.

chunruktur says:
but cant like tt eh

mature thinking affects my looks. "dude, i thought you were 23!" -.- says:
lol

chunruktur says:
we must have a good cert to secure our future

mature thinking affects my looks. "dude, i thought you were 23!" -.- says:
it was me telling you that de

mature thinking affects my looks. "dude, i thought you were 23!" -.- says:
now it's your turn to consel me seh.

mature thinking affects my looks. "dude, i thought you were 23!" -.- says:
haha

chunruktur says:
hahahas

chunruktur says:
fair mah

chunruktur says:
lols

mature thinking affects my looks. "dude, i thought you were 23!" -.- says:
wth..

mature thinking affects my looks. "dude, i thought you were 23!" -.- says:
-.-"
ok, jie min.. i will not slack and work hard..

okok, for the past week, i did a very serious mistake.

I FORGOTTEN HIU TUNG'S BIRTHDAY. I was very guilt-ridden.

to make myself feel better, i attended his 'birthday celebrations' with 269(chun ann, vincent, tony, eugene and samuel) with ruo han and i as the extras, on the Friday. we bumbed into 2 other birthday celebrarions btw.

i apprantly overslept and was late along with Vincent. man, he's getting more suave and hot. oops. then because of tony's request, we ate Seoul Garden at Marina Square. We ate lots of chicken meat and cake served by the Seoul Garden staff (they were so nice to sing tony the birthsay song).

meanwhile enjoying the 'old school flashbacks', it was a mental torture as well. it was like everytime there was something being mentioned, i was inevitablely reminded of my past in sceondary sch life.

followed by dinner was a walk on the top of the esplande, which obviously was a great place for couples to hang out. hance, i took my mind off the sec sch issue to participate in the peeking of the couples intimitating acts. lol. it was fun for us but not so for the couples ba.. hahah

after embrassing ourselves enough, we found ourselves at a very schecluded part of town. then more past memories flowed back to my mind to push the night's atmosphere to a new low for me. avoided the continued episode of the "old school flashbacks" then went home by the MRT and i did something i hadn't done for sometime.

pretending to be a smart alex.

haix, won't go into details, but those who know wat i mean, so sorry. feels so stupid whenever i recall that..

anyway, a quote to summarize my night's experience,

"Instead of feeling alone in a group, why not feel myself in my own solitude?"

ONg LAi

sorry feelings

yo pple

today is a fresh week and the end of ngee ann poly student's holiday. one word, HAH.

then got back some of the grades of the mid-term papers.

i got only a B+ overall for my maths grade til now. so sad, it's not even an A.

Haiz, undergoing a mid-tern crisis now.. two words, work harder.

the due to the disappointing grades of MTH131, i went on a binge and then my brain lagged. so this was what happened.

---------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

me: "kim, ice-cream, chocolate, banana and cookie~~ come on, my treat for your birthday gift!!"

Kim(grabs wallet and phone): "ok"

[while walking, i asked her abt some words in Korean. well, to keep me mind off the results.]

[after getting Ice cream]

Kim(stone in front of the auntie] : ".................."

Me: " pay leh, kim, why you so blur?!"

---------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

it was supposed to be my treat. so sorry now. lucky she say she will let me make it up to her.. heng ar..

then talking to Mervin til now. seems like i am gg to eat at the SP.. HAH.

ok, need to sleep to replenish my energy.

some quick replies to my tag box..

Tracy and illi: my tag box is kinda like your conversation box now -.-
feimin: dun be sorry, somethings can't be helped..

YuJun
ps, my midterm got only a 86/100 and the overall is 83.6% ONLY! sad.

100th post!

Yo People!

well, if you are seeing this post,it's my 100th post!!!

well. actually it's nth much lar, so not going to harp at this nonsensical topic.

went to see the movie "The Drummer" today with the usual people at the usual place, AMK hub after practice and lunch.

not gg to tell the whole story out although it is actually quite simple.

"drummer" is kinda like an artistic show, the pace of the movie tells you that and the scenes is another characteristic of the art film kinda thingy. but the pace links to the story, so i consider it ok.

however, while watching the starting of the movie, i think of the word "shallow woman" whenever the female actress's name is being said. basically, she is a sex toy for the men, having good looks, no brains(maybe can't even spell, HAH), afraid of power and not willing to stand up for the love the male lead had for her. oops, she didn't had love for him, which is why, oh well. BIMBO~~

then the love or lust made that guy crazy. then slowly bits and scenes of that female actress lead to one conclusion, leave this kind of woman alone, for she can destroy you.

ok, enough of complaining. oh ya, there's another thing i learnt today.

remember those scenes you see on TV where the roles always tell the one, who drinks to end the sorrows/frustrations, that "drinking will nto solve anything?"

well, i can tell you that's very much true.

after a few+++ cups of Martel corden blue (on the rock), the frustrations is still there within me. and then 40% is getting to be no kick for me le, oh no, what to do, it is getting increasing harder for me to get drunk le.. my my.

at least i know it is kinda hard to get me drunk to do irrational stuff. that's a plus point i think. HAH

okok, got to sleep le..

tmrw K-box got promotion!! sry to ruo han, tony and janice. got to work.. cannot go to K with you guys.. haiz, chalets.

bye bye.

YuJun/ONg LAi

"drumming is not just drumming, it leaves the beats in your heart, becoming your heartbeat."

song post.

YO PPle!!

this post will be on songs!! hope can gather the stuff that i need to do so..

first up,

哲學家 by 范瑋琪



well. you are probably hearing the song right now since i set the code to be auto play(not after i reset the code to be play only when you click). it is kinda new and i am promoting it, very nice. the songs in this album 哲學家 are all very nice, but then this song has a very nice feel to it that makes you wanna dance but then not as noisy like those dance songs.

from movie " music and lyrics" , 'the melody you hear is like when you see a person, his/her appearance, the lyrics is who the person really is.'

so here's the lyrics!! if only we can go online and start knowing people better like a song.

哲学家演唱：范玮琪
专辑：哲学家
作曲：Lisa

如果爱是道北极光
如果我可以睡在沙滩
如果 我变成小孩如果
如果　如果真的那麼难
没有人很了解我吧　我是这麼想
我希望要的生活　谁说了才算

我想我是一个哲学家 可以赞助孤单的家乡
不要人问　不要人猜　不要人一直管
不需要说　不需要听　不需要那麼忙

如果我是一个哲学家
忘了一个心中的名字有多难
看一本书　走一段路　逛一个美术馆
听一首歌　过一条河　喝一碗酸梅汤

在这一秒　扮演一个爱情的自由国王
左想右想　世界原来那麼不一样

於是我看见了海浪
於是我前往一个机场
於是有好几小时慢慢慢慢忘了什麼烦
时间它停止了吗我想想未来
我想我也出一个大约的模样

我想我是一个哲学家可以赞助孤单的家乡
不要人问　不要人猜　不要人一直管
不需要说　不需要听　不需要那麼忙
如果我是一个哲学家忘了一个心中的名字有多难看
一本书　走一段路　逛一个美术馆
听一首歌 过一条河　喝一碗酸梅汤

一个哲学家
一个 一个哲学家

我想我是一个哲学家
可以赞助孤单的家乡
不要人问　不要人猜　不要人一直管
不需要说　不需要听　不需要
那麼忙如果我是一个哲学家
忘了一个心中的名字有多难
看一本书　走一段路　逛一个美术馆
听一首歌　过一条河　喝一碗酸梅汤

不要人问　不要人猜　不要人一直管
不需要说　不需要听　不需要那麼忙

Second Song


王:你是我心内的一首歌
王:心间开启花一朵
s:你是我生命的一首歌
s:想念汇成一条河
王:点在我心内的一首歌
王:不要只是个过客
s:在我生命留下一首歌
s:不论结局会如何


合:好想问你
合:对我到底有没有动心
合:沉默太久
s:只会让我不小心犯错
王:不小心犯错


s:点在我心内的一首歌
s:不要只是个过客
王:在我生命留下一首歌
王:不论结局会如何


合:你是我心内的一首歌
合:心间开启花一朵
合:你是我生命的一首歌
s:想念汇成一条河
王:想念汇成一条河


s:好想问你
王:好想问你
s:对我到底有没有动心
王:对我到底有没有动心
s:沉默太久
王:沉默太久
s:只会让我不小心犯错
王:不小心犯错


合:点在我心内的一首歌
合:不要只是个过客
合:在我生命留下一首歌
合:不论结局会如何

OK, two for today, pls take so time to look at the lyrics if you understand. took me to get the spacing and paragraph correct.

YuJun

Enlye ONg or Enili ONg

Que, dun be cpoycat!!

Quizzes and personality tests!!

YO pPLe!

from time to time, there is always this urge to do personality tests.

so after i saw julie's blog some time ago, i did the test and kept it somewhere in my computer until now. so, know me better. well, it is quite true.

Get to know yourself better

Your view on yourself:
Other people find you very interesting, but you are really hiding your true self. Your friends love you because you are a good listener. They'll probably still love you if you learn to be yourself with them.

The type of girlfriend/boyfriend you are looking for:
You are a true romantic. When you are in love, you will do anything and everything to keep your love true.

Your readiness to commit to a relationship:
You are ready to commit as soon as you meet the right person. And you believe you will pretty much know as soon as you meet that person.

The seriousness of your love:
You like to flirt and behave seductively. The opposite sex finds this very attractive, and that's why you'll always have admirers hanging off your arms. But how serious are you about choosing someone to be in a relationship with?

Your views on education
You may not like to study but you have many practical ideas. You listen to your own instincts and tend to follow your heart, so you will probably end up with an unusual job.

The right job for you:
You have plenty of dream jobs but have little chance of doing any of them if you don't focus on something in particular. You need to choose something and go for it to be happy and achieve success.

How do you view success:
You are confident that you will be successful in your chosen career and nothing will stop you from trying.

What are you most afraid of:
You are afraid of things that you cannot control. Sometimes you show your anger to cover up how you feel.

Who is your true self:
You are mature, reasonable, honest and give good advice. People ask for your comments on all sorts of different issues. Sometimes you might find yourself in a dilemma when trapped with a problem, which your heart rather than your head needs to solve.

http://www.quizbox.com/personality/test82.aspx


What's your personality love style?

Here is the analysis:
You desire a love that will last forever. You are quite serious about finding this type of love, and that's why you think carefully about the men that you meet before deciding whether you could really love them. You don't just develop a crush on someone overnight: you look at a person's personality and other aspects of their life before deciding to form an attachment. If a guy doesn't meet your expectations, you would rather be alone. Your love has to be perfect. Be careful though, you could be missing out on some worthy relationships because your standards are so high.

http://www.quizbox.com/personality/test80.aspx?q=b


What type of personality do you have?

Here is the analysis:
Kind and Gentle
Your kindness is your charm - you are also gentle and sweet. Everybody likes to be around people with your personality. Like a psychologist, people like to talk to you to discuss their problems because you are proper and discrete, as well as confident. You look mature and people respect you. People with this kind of character are few and far between.

http://www.quizbox.com/personality/test79.aspx

haha that's it for now..

so good night then, just came home from the 'thank you party' by heritage fest. beat up walking around with Terrie and li wen. tmrw still having my English mid terms.

NIght!!

Yu Jun
Enlil or Enlye?

tracy, definitely not Wayne, it rhythm with gay.
illi. your URL does not seem to function. re tag pls. then i relink.